I'm Helping the Homeless!

So I'm walking to work this morning, drinking my Major Dickason's and rocking out with my iPod*, as I do, when I come to one of my regular homeless guys. I say "my regular," because I tend to patronize** a few homeless guys in particular more than others. It's partially a function of geography, since I walk the same way to work most of the time. Over time, I guess I've developed more of a rapport with some than with others.

Anyway.

I get to one of my "regulars," in front of Peet's coffee. I dig some change out of my pocket, and I drop it into his cup. I'm walking away, once again rocking out.* As I do.

Then I have a thought: In addition to my change, I may have dropped 20mg of Paxil*** in the guy's cup.

I check my pocket, and sure enough! The little happy pill is no longer there. For a brief moment, I weighed the idea of going back. But then I played it out in my head.

Homeless guy in front of Peet's coffee: Spare any change today?

Me: Hey, I'm sorry to bother you, but remember a minute ago? When I came by and dropped some change in your cup? Yeah, I think I may also have dropped in a pill of a popular anti-depressant.

Homeless guy: What did it look like?

Me: It was pink, round--

Homeless guy: Paxil?

Me: Yeah-- what?

So I decided to let that particular pill go.

Then I had another idea. Maybe I should make that kind of my calling card! I give a little change, a happy little pill.

So I'll say it now, just to get it out of the way. If you are in San Francisco, and you meet a homeless person who seems better adjusted and able to cope with his problems? That was me, and you're welcome.

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*First song, as I left home: "Rockin' the Suburbs," Ben Folds. Second song, as I met up with the homeless guy: "Savoy Truffle," the Beatles. I am not paid to endorse Ben Folds, the Beatles, or the iPod.

**Here I am using patronize in the sense of "to be a regular customer/sponsor of," as opposed to in the sense of "to treat in a condescending manner." Condescending means talking down to.

***Paxil® is an antidepressant medication in the class of agents as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs). As with any prescription medication, Paxil® may cause some side effects, which are usually mild to moderate and may fade or disappear completely over time. Common side effects of Paxil® may include nausea, infection, diarrhea, dry mouth, constipation, decreased appetite, sleepiness, dizziness, sexual side effects, nervousness, tremor, yawning, sweating, weakness or insomnia. Medicines known as monoamine oxidase inhibitors (MAOIs), thioridazine or pimozide should not be taken while you are taking Paxil®. Ask your doctor if Paxil® is right for you! I am not paid to endorse Paxil®, either.